I know this morning is but a wee 4 hours old, but it has been a doozie! It could be compared to being in a little flimsy raft riding wild and raging rapids through a jagged gorge of a canyon.
But now the tempest has subsided and the storm has calmed. We have all emerged unscathed. Mommy never lost her temper (by the complete and utter grace of our good God) and the children were dealt with firmly, calmly and lovingly.
Amazingly enough, as I look back over the morning, it turned out pretty darn OK. Believe me this must most definitely be a divine and grace inspired perspective and not my feeble human one. At some point, around 7:45 am as I made my bed, I realized I had a choice. As Andrew cried about some miscellaneous something for about the tenth time in the last 45 minutes and Michael continually screeched and cried and fussed over some other miscellaneous something (I so hope he's teething), I knew I was at a point where my actions would set the tone for MY day. The children had most likely already set the tone for theirs, but mine was still held in the balance. I could scream and yell and act in a generally frustrated manner - goodness knows that's what I was feeling. Or I could stay calm. And so I chose. It was a hard choice. It was a rocky morning. And the fact that I made the choice to stay calm did not change how incredibly difficult everything and everyone was. But I think that is what made things turn out OK.
This is only the morning of the Monday of the FIRST week of Lent and I am a little worried about the sacrifices and gifts of self that the rest of Lent might require. But when I look at all that happened this morning and see in it the Lenten sacrifices that God has chosen for me to make this morning, it all seems fruitful. It is part of my Lent, not just a bad morning, an interruption to what should be happiness and bliss.
I am ready. I am willing. Refine away! (I think?)