Friday, March 23, 2007

First Outing as a Mom of Four

Call me crazy. But this morning I braved a trip out with all four little children. Now, Brian and I are not big on taking our babies out those first 6-8 weeks, other than trips to family and other rather uncrowded places. And I am sure with my first, I never would have taken him to the Home Depot garden center at 1 month old. But, as Brian and I have noted several times over this past month, things are just different now with our fourth. So, the idea hit me several days ago that I really wanted to shape up our backyard this weekend. I decided flowers were in order. So I after breakfast and tanking up the little wee one this morning, we put on shoes, took potty breaks and ventured out! I figured outside at Home Depot was probably a pretty harmless place and it was. It wasn't very populated and the weather was pleasant and breezy. I had visions as we drove along of my little children cooperating in every way and Michael sleeping happily in the stroller. We would leisurely stroll through the aisles, enjoy the flowers and, of course, get absolutely everything we came for. Call me delusional.

We got out of the van and I wrangled the stroller from the back. Then I did the dirty job of disrupting my sleeping angel to transfer him to the stroller. Crying ensued. Andrew was also crying because he did not want to unbuckle and get out of the van - he wanted to fiddle with the buckles. Jacob was having a wee bit of trouble getting a cart. We pressed on.

A nice employee lifted the garden hose so we could get under and I pointed Jacob towards a different cart. Andrew was a little slower behind us. We browsed the flowers and Michael was not calming down. I decided to pick him up and got Nicole to be in charge of the stroller. Michael was still not happy. I had told the kids they could each pick out 2 pots of flowers they liked. They were all busy and happy and Michael was still crying as I shifted him from shoulder to shoulder, arm to arm. Every time we left an area, Andrew lagged behind. Some miscellaneous older lady helpfully guided him my direction one time. As we perused the veggie section, I heard some man say to his wife, "I think what you need is 3 or 4 more." Michael was still fussing, but I thought pushing him in his stroller would really be better and calm him down - WRONG! So I picked him up again and went to retrieve Andrew from the veggie plants. The gentleman we had been near earlier walked by and said again, "I think what you need is 3 or 4 more." Odd. Oh. Then I realized that he had been speaking to me all along. He wasn't being rude at all, but in my flustered state all I could manage to say was, "Mmm Hmm, thank you."

I felt as if all eyes were on me. This crazy mother with for little ones at Home Depot of all places. What was she thinking? What was I thinking? I had been thinking it would be fun. Was it? If only I hadn't brought them all, Michael wouldn't be crying. That's silly. Of course he would be, just at home. I was not frustrated or upset, just merely felt like me and my little charges stuck out like a sore thumb, blinked like a neon sign.

Then things changed.

We went to another section and somehow I managed to get Michael into a position where he was comfortable and happy and he quieted down. I barely moved my arms. We parked the cart and the stroller in a central location. Nicole carried my purse on her shoulder. There was peace and order. The children were happily walking along with me, enjoying all the flowers and plants. Jacob was being helpful and talkative. Nicole was proud to carry the purse. Andrew followed along and delighted in the sights. We gathered more flowers. We wandered around. We filled up our cart. I was the epitome of calm. My children were delightful. It was fun. Really, it was.

I felt as if all eyes were on me. Wow, look at that lady. She looks as though she's got it all together (if only they knew). And look at those adorable children. How does she do it? How do I do it? By the grace of my wonderful God! I felt good. I felt like a heavenly light was surrounding us. I sensed grace and beauty and love. I CAN do this. God is faithful to me. He told me many months ago that he would give me what I needed to love and care for these four children he has given me and Brian. He is faithful.

So we waited in line without complaints. The lady rang up our purchases and Jacob paid her with the gift cards I had given him to safeguard in his pocket. We walked to our van, loaded up and went home. It was a great first trip out!

2 comments:

mom-in-training said...

0You go, girl! My heart just went out to you as I was reading the difficult time you had on your first outing and then I came to the line "Then things changed." I am so happy that God turned it all peaceful and allowed you to have a wonderful first shopping experience as a mom of four! And special praise for your four precious little ones who behaved so well, and especially to Jacob and Nicole for the help they gave. How awesome!!! And I can't wait to see all of your new lovely flowers! :)

He who wears the most black wins. said...

Awesome. Just awesome. You give me hope, friend!

So glad it went so well. Now, you MUST post pics of that gorgeous garden when it's ready!