Well, it was a happy day, albeit a little less than perfect. It started out lovely - lovely breakfast for mom in bed, lovely gift and a lovely Mass together. Even a lovely hour to myself to work on a quilt that I've been dying to get to. Then at 2pm the rain began and the power went out. Rain? No biggy. Power? I was sure it would just be a short blip in power service and then we'd be back up and running. Not so. The power eventually came back on at 1:30 am. Thankfully, the cloudy, rainy day cooled everything down and it was pretty comfortable. Thankfully, we had planned on grilling steaks and didn't need power for that (even though we did run out of grill gas half way through cooking). But at some point I managed to started to feel a little sorry for myself. Yep, leave it to me. I felt like I was working a little more than I had imagined I would be. (Big wretched sigh from readers) Aaaaaaw! And things were just a little difficult with the power out. Aaaaaaw! And the children still needed me to be a mommy - imagine that! :) At some point, God spoke to my heart and reminded me how good I have it - Mother's Day and everyday. So as I scrubbed a pan in the sink, I made an effort to do a difficult thing. I prayed and offered up my little bit of work and imperfection for all those Mommies who were working MUCH MUCH harder than me and whose lives are far less ideal than mine. Here's to Mommies all over the world!
Later that night, I was crying as I talked with Brian about my day. Sometimes I believe I am just too busy to allow myself to stop and think about the following sorts of things. What made me cry was the great sadness I felt at the realization that I could no longer remember exactly what it felt like to hold the baby bodies of my two older children, Jacob and Nicole. I know now what Andrew feels like as I hold him, but I don't remember those little details now about the others. I want to remember every little thing. I do not wish them back at that age because I am so enjoying them now as they are and watching them grow. But I do wish I had a perfect memory! I guess it makes me want to savor these kinds of things more - more photos, more journaling, more videos.
I am so thankful for my precious children. All I ever wanted to be was a wife and mommy and here I am.
Happy Mother's Day!
1 comment:
Wasn't the darkness fun? If I miss Grey's Anatomy tonight I am going to have a fit.
I feel like that about Jacob a lot, I even yearn to remember how it was when Adam was a newborn and it's hard to do. They just slowly become so different, we don't even realize it. I think this is why I am having such a hard time with Jacob going to school, I want to remember his sweet baby smell and that point in time when he baby talked and had to be rocked to sleep. This is my hardest part about being a parent, I am glad it is though, because so many other parents have so many more issues I would never want to endure. Glad to hear I am not the only sentimental sap in the world.
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