Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Ask and you shall receive

But I have learned in the most recent years of our marriage that husbands do not read minds. And finally, after nine years, I decided I could act upon the knowledge I have gained. With a little stubbornness, I did just that this evening.

I am no longer upset that Brian cannot read my mind. I will no longer hope that he will magically wake up one morning and know what I am thinking (often times I don't even know). Instead, I will take the advice of many seasoned women and just tell him what I am thinking or needing.

So tonight, as I scrubbed a pot, Brian was talking about the different things we could get done this evening. I began to brood and stew.

"Doesn't he know that I am SOOO in need of a break? Cant he see I am worn down by all this sickness and would love some quiet uninterrupted time to read sometime before 11:30PM? Why hasn't he asked me if I would like to go somewhere?"

Then I stopped. I gathered my thoughts. I vocalized.

ME: "You know, I would love to get out of the house for a break."

BRIAN: "Oh, OK. Why don't you take Nicole on an outing." (Good suggestion. That would be fun, but doesn't meet the quiet book reading requirement.)

ME: "Well, actually, I would like to go alone and read."

BRIAN: "OK. Go get a coffee and read."

Of course, then he had to twist my arm (practically off my body) because I felt guilty leaving him at seven in the evening with four children, one of which is a sick 2 year old. But I went.

I went to one of the 5 billion Starbucks within 5 minutes of our house. I got a yummy White Chocolate Raspberry Mocha. I read. I read for 45 minutes. I finished my organizing book. I walked down to Kroger for a few garage sale supplies. I filled the van with gas.

I returned home refreshed. I got what I needed. And all I had to do was ask. I kind of like the asking thing. No more silly mind reading around here.


mom-in-training said...

I'm so glad you got the rest you needed - sounds like a wonderful break! And how awesome that once you vocalized your need to Brian, he, without hesitation, obliged. I'm still not very good at that vocalizing thing. I often get upset at Bill for not reading my mind... Quite often, really. I definitely need to work on it, though, because obviously the results are far better when you speak your mind! :)

Melissa said...

Good for you, Celeste! And good for YOU, Brian!

You know, I play that silly mind reading game, too, way more often than I'd care to admit. What a great lesson you've shared with us! It sounds like you had a wonderful, peaceful time. And, you know what? I bet the kids really enjoyed their special time with dad, too!

Mom of boys said...

So happy for you! I too vocalized my need to get out last night. I went and took advantage of the school supply sales at Target and then just wandered around, without children. Quite relaxing!

Jill said...

Good for you. I think you've given us all some ideas now! :)