Tuesday, May 01, 2007

And, yes, I am still alive!

I know I have been miserably absent and I know last night's post didn't really count. So now I sit down in a little bit of quiet time to write. To jump back on the blogging wagon. I am not sure how you can miss something that you consciously choose to ignore or not do, but I have missed posting blog entries. I believe Melissa said a similar thing in a recent post and somehow I understand it. Maybe it is the camaraderie and fellowship i feel as I post my heart and wait to hear from my dearest friends. Whatever it may be, I miss it when I am gone.

As to the reason for my absence, I would just have to first say that the last two weeks have been overwhelming. These weeks were spent preparing to and trying to decide if we should buy a new house we have really liked for a long time. The house isn't too far from here. It is a new house, inventory. We have loved the floor plan for a long time, but it has always been to expensive. Or we haven't liked the options they had chosen for a particular inventory home (that's how Lennar builds them). Recently, as in a little over two weeks ago, we found out that there was one available that had the options we liked and was VERY affordable. Due to the slouchy housing market, Lennar is ready to move their inventory. We began the process and prayed God would show us where we need to be - this house or some house in the future. House buying, as probably many of you know is a very daunting thing. Lots of phonecalls, lots of big adults discussion, lots of excitement and lots of worry. I don't quite remember the process being quite so involved and exhausting the first time, but then we didn't have any children 8 years ago either.

In the end we have decided it is a "no-go" at this point in time. I know the house is still available, so I guess it could change if other things changed. The taxes turned out to be higher than we would like and the people factor (those we'd miss) became more and more important to us. We live about 5 to 10 minutes from my parents and this move would put us farther away from them. Brian's parents wold like to move closer to us when we move (they're only 20 minutes away right now), but they prefer to not move to that area. And we would be leaving behind some best friends, that also happen to be our neighbors, if we moved. We feel pretty at peace with our choice, but I know God is in control.

In the meantime, I am trying to get back to more of a normal routine around here. I think the children suffered some mommy neglect as I struggled to maintain this house AND make phonecalls AND research on the Internet AND WORRY. Yesterday was a good day. Today was a little more trying in many ways, but it is a load off my shoulders to not be "house buying" for the time.

So I am back. I have set my sights in the children. On finishing our Kindergarten year. On being a little bit more fun and lighthearted (didn't happen today). On finding peace in contentment. On organizing and cleaning out the beautiful home we do have. And, of course, may my eyes be fixed on the only thing that really matters in the end, Jesus and my journey towards Heaven.

1 comment:

Melissa said...

I have really missed you, too! I always wonder what you're up to and how you're doing when you're quiet for a while, and from the sound of it, there HAS been a lot going on! I'm sorry it didn't work out with the house, but I know that the disappointment you may feel is coupled with the joy of getting to stay in your familiar, cherished home near your familiar, cherished friends! We, too, recently found a new home with the exact floor plan that I have been coveting for quite a while now, and it was priced well below what they typically sell for. But really, when I thought about the possiblity of actually LEAVING our home, I just didn't think I'd be able to do it. This house and our yard hold the evidence of all the hard work and love we've put into it, not to mention the memories that live within these walls: bringing babies home from the hospitals, first steps, first Christmases...a home is a hard place to leave! I think that if it's meant to be, it will be. I hope that whatever happens, you will be at peace.

Thank you so much for the e-mail...I will respond soon! In the meantime, know that I am thinking of you and praying for you often.